FS.Rain

Nothing's EZ~

2008-06-30T00:07:38+08:00

Yoo~

Hmm.. to-date as weighed at home, should have lost like 10-11kgs. The fats are cooperating well and I have grown to love garnier even more as their bodyfit firming hydrating lotion really leave on a hydrated feel... so smooth~

This morning Polin Aunty came.. haha! We asked alot of qns, asked on career lah.. and for my case, its gonna be a life long uneven ride according to her, and thus "job-hopper" shall be thye name! We asked about love too~ Guess wat? Next year shall be when the peach blossoms luck bloom! Haha! At that instance, that gut feeling that I had to do something about my weight sort of makes sense now... wat? preparing for that someone's arrival? LOL

Anyway, I recalled the instance that I felt the urge and seriousness in my attitude to start getting aware of property came to mind. Its like then, I got serious because a Need is coming by... So we shall sit back and see if this is really how my body works... Giving out signals according to the Timing in Life.

Spoken a little more and there I found out that the way to a healthy body is not stopping at the weight problem. The root of problem lies on my stomach and digestive system. More work to do now that the aunty has w'orked it out' for me.

I believe, that aint gonna be EZ but Im sure I will pull it off quite well. Its gonna feel real good to accomplish the goals you've set an to proof something's right and so forth. I wana have a taste of that!

Bikini suit >>> shall be my christmas present for myself!

FS.Rain | Celsius
a.k.a. Fangru

New photos uploaded~ I'm back~!!

2008-05-22T00:20:56+08:00

Hello hello~

Have not pop-by for quite awhile, and I wonder how's everybody doing??
I have been gaming in GE for sometime... haha~ I've finally got a personal computer~!!!
But have not been updating my blogs or even my webbie which I have thought of updating/re-vamping since... god knows when... LOLx

Anyway, I have finally decided that I should resolve to the first thought that I had to lose my excess baggage several years ago.. and hence, right about 1 month ago, I started my accupuncture weight-loss programme.

Results seemed good so far. Lost 6KGs already, and the fats have been soften much more easily as compared to the previous time when I tried those commercial gimmicks~ Appetite well balanced now, and I'm not feeling any bad effects from the stress that I received from work that tended to affect my appeitite in those days..

But then, with this new diet that comes along with the accupuncture treatment, I got into some sort of mild constipation now and then, about 3 times thus far. According to the physician, its just simply due to the fact that you are not eating that much nor eating hard to digest food, and therefore, lesser work to be done by your lovely intestines and lesser motions within.. I really hate to feel bloated due to all these constipation hits~

Well well, damn glad that those pants which I've purchased prior to my treatment are now lose..
I really hope that my resolution for this new year will come true~

That is: GET A NEW & SEXY YOU~!!

Cheerios,
FS.Rain|Celsius

Back from Taipei~!!!

2007-10-11T00:39:12+08:00

Been back for more than a week, but my posts are yet to be up...

Even my photos are not completely uploaded... Well, at least some of it is up.

You can check it out in my album.

Will try... really try to post up my trips sOOn... *^u^*'

FS.Rain

Lost-in-touch

2007-09-10T19:50:22+08:00

霜, is this cute lady born in Indonesia whom I met during my last two years of seconday, and who always amaze me with her sense of humor, her unique personality and way of speech/intonation, and lastly, her interest in astronomy.

It's like 3 years back that we last got in touch.... I thought that we will stay lost in touch....

Just yesterday, a sms that invites me to a gathering hooked me up with her.

I guess, the reason behind my not-so-worried attitude towards our lost of contact is that I know that she'll be back? On top of that, we will meet again? Somehow? Hahaha... I don't know... but deep down inside, I was not really that worried about losing touch with her.

I heard that she's all the same.... but attached... so I lost my chance? Hahahahaha!! No way!! I'm still heterosexual thoguh!

But it's such a great feeling to have, to have found someone whom you have not get in contact after so long.

We really should cherish every moment that we have with the ones we care.

In recent times, I have been thinking, while I am looking, looking at my love ones... I have grown older, and they have aged. I truly wonder how much more time we have left. I am thoroughly amazed by how fast that time could really fly...

If only we are awaken the moment we come into this world.

If only we are able to know that time is exhaustible as we come into this world.

If only we are able to view the present and look into our future as we come into this world.

If only we do... I guess time will never be priceless.

Hmm...

What was all that about?

^v^

FS.Rain

Also known as Ah-Bang in the older days...

'Waking-up' in the Morning to work

2007-07-21T13:09:51+08:00

While walking towards the front of the platform to wait for my train (morning routine to work), I saw this lady who stood very close to the doors and was talking on phone. Not that she was particularly good-figured, or that she's a great beauty, but I just happen to notice her because she stood so close to the door? I think? Anyway, she was dressed in black top and bottoms, but I didn't managed to note if she's young or middle age... But I just noticed her.

Why? I'm sure that you who are reading is wondering, that I am talking about this someone who has no significance to whoever... haha... here goes the actual point that I am trying to make:

As I walk towards the front of the platform, while I was closing the distance between that particular lady-in-black-standing-near-door, I saw something scurried up her back... "EH>?! Did I SEE something? I did!!! I looked carefully and to my extreme HORROR, I saw a cockaroach around 2 inch in length crawling up her back!!!" O~O

My oh my.... many thoughts flashed passed, and I was already detouring and moving towards the lady before I realise it. The next thing that I know is that I am already at her back and she is still talking on the phone (note: I had my music plugged to my ears, I didn't catch what she was talking on the phone nor had the time to look at her if she noticed my presence through the reflection on the glass doors).

At that point, serveral solutions to this 'creepy' situation came to thought, and I felt the adrenaline rush (the famous flight or fight reaction to prepare for action, natural response from the human body... It felt good!!! Heh heh...). "Should I just tell her and walk off? Tap her shoulders get her attention? No!! Ah!! Kroach-san is already at her shoulders! Eeeeeeeeewwwwwww!!!! Ah crap! Grab the feelers and throw it to the floor and stomp till its dead? Yucks! What if it attack me before I can touch its long feelers? And why the hell do I wanna get in touch with that disgusting Kroach??!!! Urgh!! Ok, swat at it!! But I've got no newspapers not slippers! Also, I'll be hitting the lady in the process of gettting Kroach-san... OR I should swat it with my plastic bag? But then I wouldn't be able to eat my food (in the plastic bag).. Oh no! its heading for the neck!! Arh!!!!!!!"

Before I knew it, my right hand reached for Kroach-san!! Lucky me, I WOKE UP and instead of really going bare-handed to swat at Kroach-san, I sort of swat the air above it, hopefully alarming it to get it flying off to elsewhere (but not on me!!). Thanks to everything and anything at all, it flew off the lady's shoulders and onto the bottom of the door infront of the lady.

Seeing that, I was even contemplating if I should kill it with my heels... eh... heels aren't exactly good for aims... eh? It's crawling away? Okay lah, you can keep your disgusting life... I shall continue my morning routine...

With that I just walked off from the spot and headed to my targeted spot. Its only when I walked off, I wondered if I appeared to be a pervert doing strange things to a lady from the back? Or did I looked like the one who placed the kroach from viewers at the back? Did that suay lady noticed that I was swating at the kroach which was crawling up her back? Did she realised she was saved? Did she wondered if I was a pervert about to prance on her? ARGH!!!! Why am I only thinking about it after what happened??

Anyway... I was still really sleepy when I was coming down from the escalators, seeing that horrible Kroach-san really WOKE ME UP!!! Haha!! Though disgusted at the thought of seeing kroach on someone, and prayed really hard to NEVER happen on me, I felt great!! I did something applaudable, a kind deed... and I sort of felt that at times of crisis/emergency(?), I would not froze on the spot... I felt really good!! *^u^*

FS.Rain

Guilt-ridden confessions

2007-07-16T11:53:28+08:00

I became aware of a fact - my boss has been working REAL HARD, real late (wee hours of the morning), even had work done at home...
As for myself, I have tons of work piling up, unable to finish during NORMAL working hours due to several meetings (with staff who walked-into my office and those scheduled ones) and other distractions. I did stay back quite frequently in attempt to complete some tasks, but its never possible to complete all that were 'due' for that day. With that, the vicious cycle of accumulation and tighter datelines kept coming back... STRESS is just one of the end/side products of such cycles.

Realisation brought back recollections of then, those times which I had just started work and was blindly putting in much time and effort with the many hours of OT to finish as many tasks as possible at work, while I was even studying part-time. That was also the period of time which I neglected the rest of the population of concern. Yet, those efforts weren't exactly appreciated. Thinking back, if I had been here with these great people in this current organization then, my efforts would have triggered satifying results and my 'spirit' may still linger. Now, I thought, I have made up my mind before ending the previous job, to not delve too much and indulge myself in work... This decision, is distrubing me, and costs me several restless nights filled with exhausting dreams, I think.

I would love to 'switch' back to my workaholic mode, but I am also afraid of the impending 'dooms' if I were to activate it. Energy is also one of my concerns, I felt old, somehow...

I guess, I need more time to think about this... More than I had expected...

FS.Rain

Your Stress is our stress, too...

2007-06-11T13:07:26+08:00

I've read your blog.
Am glad to notice that we still have an important place in your heart. Though our words may have hurt you, you did it too, with your own. Not that I am trying to push the blame on you, but at times, you don't think, you act on how you felt. You gave in to your emotions and let them run over your brain and control your body without consiously knowing so.
Despite everything, I am really contended to know that you are aware of your own actions and thoughts, ESPECIALLY those that will harm yourself and get us all hurt by it. Please always remember that, you are not alone. You tend to take great likings to place yourself in your own world, a world which you think that you are at disadvantage. A world that you think that you are a victim of 'lost attentions/affections'. A world that you think that you lost all freedom, and all will to live on....
But you are not. That is just an illusion, a land of escapade which you drew yourself in. Amidst everything else that is revolving around you, you went in and out of that place. Mind you, however cruel it is to be living in REALITY, you are still going to live through it.
You have come thus far, but there's still a long long way ahead. Everyone else may come and go. We, unlike any others, are here to stay. The reason, I'm sure you know.
I would say that at this stage of your life, your studies are of utmost important. I am not saying that you have done nothing or attempted nothing at all in maintaining where you were. However, I think that you need to spend some time to re-prioritise your time and your priorities at this time of the year. It is just 6 more months before you move on to another level, another part of your life. You maybe able to join in a tertiary program, you may have to serve the nation. I, for one, would prefer that you fight for the opportunity to pursue your studies as it may be harder after a break of 2.5years if you are to serve the nation... you know what I mean, and you have seen it before, how I managed work, family and studies all at the same time. Or perhaps, you didn't notice that it was hard for me, too?

I know that you felt like the whole world weigh down on you, things don't work out, all these relationships came up with problems one after another... How about thinking of someone else who is much worse than you? There's always this saying that there is someone who is better than you (人外有人,天外有天), there is also someone who is much worse! No rush to solve ALL problems at once, take it one by one. Slowly, coz your efforts in resolving the issues will show.

Sacrifices hurts. But regrets cuts deeper. It is better to make some sacrifices now than to have regrets eating you away later. Think things through. I hate to say this but you do have to decide and make some sacrifices to ensure that you pave your own path as you set your foundation for your own future. We have gone through these many times before, you know what you want and what you need. It is fine to be selfish at times, as long as you are not doing it at the expense of others. You can always talk to us, especially mum. It may not seem obivous to you, but to me, she knows very little of what you are going through at this stage of life. You have not shared much with her. Trust me, she is a good advisor, though the way she's gonna say it may hurt you, but you must always remember that she is just trying to point out the cold hard facts that you may have wished to not acknowledge.

We have talked to her and even suggested to her to not delve into your BGR, hope it helps. But I hope that what I have commented to you previously on that issue is not forgotten.

Do check your gmail sometime... I think I will not post it up here for all to read as we go forward... I do have to watch what I say afterall... it's a public space!!

While watching VCD...

2007-06-01T12:56:12+08:00

Last night, well, actually it's in the wee hours of this morning, all three of us were still in the living room watching this JDrama series when in the midst of watching, things happened:

Right at the corner of my eyes, where I can see both Xiu and Bao who were siting diagonally across my right, I saw the two of them raising their arms. Both raised their arms together spontaneously! Just as I thought it was strange of them to raise one of their arms for no reason, I had a glimpse of something in their hands... its one slipper in each hand!!

I turned my head to look at them clearly, true enough, they were indeed holding their arms up with a slipper in each of their hands, in a stance like that of one who is aiming to hit something. ITS SO FUNNY!! I COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING!!

Hahaha, well, its all because of the little bug that flew past them (which I missed noticing) and its just their reflexes against such flying bugs!! But its so funny!! What's even better was the bug-hitting-show that was put-up when the bug flew down towards one of them and all hell break loose.. Armed with a slipper in their hands, they sprang from the floor and were swatting at the bug and at one point, the bug went 'blurred' and headed for Xiu's slipper, and then goes a 'thud-thud', down goes the bug after being hit Xiu and then bounced off the wall before landing on the floor.

Victory for the spontaneous bug busters!!

Trust me... if only I can paint the picture... it is really hilarious!!

FS.Rain

Dreams... Life?!

2007-05-29T13:26:13+08:00

One of my most recent dreams that I can ever recall is about this 'idol' that me and xiu supports. I won't talk about it here as I have already done so in my Wretch blog... I was just thinking... Are there any underlying messages from the dreams that we have? The old chinese saying always depict it as a result of what you have been going through recently and what you have been thinking of frequently. But is it always so? I'm glad that I don't always remember what I dreamt of, if I am able to do so, it usually affects the quality of my sleep.
~~~~~

Life?!
I started having thoughts of Life ever since I was about the age 6 or so. If I didn't remember wrongly, it was sort of spurred by my drunk father who behaved, looked like, and sounded like he was dying... I was really scared... scared of 'Death', then.

What exactly is Life? My ex-classmate Shuang used to love to ask me this everyday, or almost everyday... "Pbang, What's Life?" Each time, I find myself giving her a different answer. I, am still unable to answer this question.

I find it a waste of time, occasionally when this question and these thoughts came up in my mind, for us to be born into the world, live through life with all the struggles, some had more, some went smooth sailing... But ultimately, we die. I always like to conclude it as "We are born to death" or "born to die" or "born and destined to die". It seems so, when simply put. The next thing that came up is "If so, why the trouble?". Why do we go through the phases and when its time for harvest, we have reached prime time, the golden age... and soon, THE END. What for?

At the point of death, everything's gone. You will cease to exist physically. What about your feelings? What about all the thoughts that we have while we were alive? Everything that we see, the senses of touch, the songs and melodys that we hear, it is so real. But what happens when I am dead? Or how is it when I die? Is there the spiritual me? Do I become a ghost? Though I have no doubts that these things exist as a form of 'after-life', but I don't feel it substantially. Knowing it is not enough to convince me that it is not too bad... Whenever thoughts of Life & also Death comes up, I felt an emptiness... I'm not sure if I am describing it correctly, but I do feel a hollowness towards the whole thing about being alive. It is scary, because it is something unknown, something that's alien. And I can't imagine, and I do not wish to imagine what it will be for me when my love ones 'depart'. It is saddening.
~~~~~~

Well well well...
I went overboard, I guess...
But I can't help but to jot it down somewhere...

FanFiction

2007-05-19T09:58:00+08:00

Whoa!
I had been terribly immensed in the world of Fan Fiction!!
http://www.fanfiction.net has tons of fabulous fics! I was really kinda addicted..

In the begining, I was only browsing, surfing the net. Was interested to find out more on HaJi of Blood+. So I found the site. Started reading... and couldn't stop. My thirst and hunger for more has never been so intense!
Well, that is, in the first place you have to really enjoy reading and getting yourself sucked into the fictional world, a world that is within your imagination!!

From there, I sported fics for Gokusen. The more I read, the stronger the urge to read the manga and watch the anime!! Coz the fics that I really enjoyed were those crossing and extracting/developed from portions of the anime, manga and JDrama. Of coz, I visualise with the faces of the Jdrama... coz the glimpse of the anime characters kind of got me a little disappointed..

All in all, I was glad that I know this language, and that there are wonderful folks out there with great writing skills and creative minds, yet generous enough to put their thoughts down to share with the rest of us out there. THANK YOU!!

There are quite a few fics that I really wana reccomend, but my eyes are failing me now... soon they will black-out, so I guess I shall do that in the next post.

PS: SF, Sorrie!! I really got too carried away with work and everything else (fics too)... I better not make any promise to send you the photos le... hope that I get to do it this weeken bah..

Fangru