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Monday, 11 June 2007

Your Stress is our stress, too...

I've read your blog.
Am glad to notice that we still have an important place in your heart. Though our words may have hurt you, you did it too, with your own. Not that I am trying to push the blame on you, but at times, you don't think, you act on how you felt. You gave in to your emotions and let them run over your brain and control your body without consiously knowing so.
Despite everything, I am really contended to know that you are aware of your own actions and thoughts, ESPECIALLY those that will harm yourself and get us all hurt by it. Please always remember that, you are not alone. You tend to take great likings to place yourself in your own world, a world which you think that you are at disadvantage. A world that you think that you are a victim of 'lost attentions/affections'. A world that you think that you lost all freedom, and all will to live on....
But you are not. That is just an illusion, a land of escapade which you drew yourself in. Amidst everything else that is revolving around you, you went in and out of that place. Mind you, however cruel it is to be living in REALITY, you are still going to live through it.
You have come thus far, but there's still a long long way ahead. Everyone else may come and go. We, unlike any others, are here to stay. The reason, I'm sure you know.
I would say that at this stage of your life, your studies are of utmost important. I am not saying that you have done nothing or attempted nothing at all in maintaining where you were. However, I think that you need to spend some time to re-prioritise your time and your priorities at this time of the year. It is just 6 more months before you move on to another level, another part of your life. You maybe able to join in a tertiary program, you may have to serve the nation. I, for one, would prefer that you fight for the opportunity to pursue your studies as it may be harder after a break of 2.5years if you are to serve the nation... you know what I mean, and you have seen it before, how I managed work, family and studies all at the same time. Or perhaps, you didn't notice that it was hard for me, too?

I know that you felt like the whole world weigh down on you, things don't work out, all these relationships came up with problems one after another... How about thinking of someone else who is much worse than you? There's always this saying that there is someone who is better than you (人外有人,天外有天), there is also someone who is much worse! No rush to solve ALL problems at once, take it one by one. Slowly, coz your efforts in resolving the issues will show.

Sacrifices hurts. But regrets cuts deeper. It is better to make some sacrifices now than to have regrets eating you away later. Think things through. I hate to say this but you do have to decide and make some sacrifices to ensure that you pave your own path as you set your foundation for your own future. We have gone through these many times before, you know what you want and what you need. It is fine to be selfish at times, as long as you are not doing it at the expense of others. You can always talk to us, especially mum. It may not seem obivous to you, but to me, she knows very little of what you are going through at this stage of life. You have not shared much with her. Trust me, she is a good advisor, though the way she's gonna say it may hurt you, but you must always remember that she is just trying to point out the cold hard facts that you may have wished to not acknowledge.

We have talked to her and even suggested to her to not delve into your BGR, hope it helps. But I hope that what I have commented to you previously on that issue is not forgotten.

Do check your gmail sometime... I think I will not post it up here for all to read as we go forward... I do have to watch what I say afterall... it's a public space!!


13:05 Posted in Family | Permalink | Comments (0) | Tags: Family, stress, communication | |  Facebook | |  Print | |

Friday, 09 March 2007

For Bro

For Lao Bao:

The same blood flows within us. But there's a temper that you tend to throw. Be it consiously or sub-consiously.

I was once, hot-headed, bad tempered, unreasonable (as per Lao Xiu), but it's all past.

Those were the days of adolescent? Teenage years? Or just a phase of puberty where our hormones rule.

You gotta control the tone of your voice when you speak. You should know that I do not throw temper or show attitude for no reason. If I started off with a normal tone of voice, and a reply/retort was displeasingly thrown back at me, I will flare up. It's Simple, I will respect one who respect himself/herself. As a family, we should be appreciative of one another. DO NOT take each family member for granted. For now, we are together. Till then, we do not know. If one day we are to part... Regrets are the last thing we want to remember for the rest of our lives.

Also, although you are still young, but our parents are no longer considered 'young'. The time that we have now, we may not have it in the next few years. Coz then, we shall be pursuing our careers, or you may wish to settle down and start a new family. It is now that you have the right timing and chance to cherish the time that we can spend with our family.

Communication is VERY IMPORTANT. We will not know what you are thinking till you vocalise it. Why so? Coz you have not been communicating to us much. You spend more time with your friends, and you have already made it clear to us that you would prefer to do that. It is ultimately your decision, but still, you need to voice out. Keeping things in you does not help in perfecting or better our family members' relationship with one another.

 Everyone's effort goes a long way. I have experienced it myself, I have done it myself, that is why today we are how we are. Try to recall how things were before the 1997... was it the same?

Then, as I remember, you were close to Lao Xiu as play mates, to me, I'm not sure if you even realise and respect me for who I am - your sis. Was mum and dad in the list of your concern? Was I part of your worries? I think, at that point, PLAYING & HAVING FUN was filling up your mind, your heart and your soul.

Everyone makes mistakes. I love to indulge in the videos / articles of those people (those Male species) whom I adore. I believe that everyone loves to indulge in things/people they like, things/people they love, and it's the same with me and you. If you need to catch my attention, you have to learn to catch it. To emphasize on the main points.

You can do anything if you put in the effort to get it done. To expect something from me or anyone else, I believe that it is equivalent to you doing it to us. Remember the old saying?

"Do unto others, what you want others to do unto you."

00:00 Posted in Family | Permalink | Comments (0) | Tags: For Lao Bao, Brother, Communication | |  Facebook | |  Print | |